Wednesday, June 21, 2006

Problems and Solutions

Problem: I have no furniture!

Solution: A dear friend of mine is donating a couch to the cause of my continued sketchiness, so I am a rather happy fellow! The only problem is the simple fact that I can't fit a couch through the train access gates, so I have to find other means to transport it.

Problem: A moving company is a good call, but they sadly charge about 25000 yen, or $250, for the perilous task of driving the couch for 10 minutes. I wish there was a cheaper way!

Solution: Renting a truck is much cheaper: about half the price!

Problem: This requries a Japanese Drivers' license.

Solution: Get a Japanese Drivers' license. And forward this logic to MENSA for review.

Problem: My Japanese is limited. While I could probably pass a driving test with flying colours, I have to understand directions to follow them.

Eg:

Instructor:
この場所で左に曲がりなさい. ("Turn Left Here", according to Google Translate, anyway.)
Brent: What? Accellerate to 85km/h and tip the car up on two wheels to get away from Smokey???
Instructor: ああああああああああああああああああああああああ!!!!(AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!)


Solution:
The Canadian Government has a deal with the Japanese government. You just fill out the proper paperwork and swap the licence for a brand new Japanese place!

Awesome!


Problem: I can't find the building where I can fill out the proper paper work.

Solution: Go to the closest train station. Get lost a lot. Wave you hands at the locals to pretend that you are changing gears while making car driving sounds until they clue in and point you in the right direction.

Problem: This isn't working. You are still very lost.

Solution: Find a nice lady, who will give you very helpful advice!

"See these raised strips on the sidewalk? Follow them. They lead to the Drivers' License Building."

Problem:
.... uh...

...

Solution: FIND the driving place by following navigation strips for BLIND people.

...

Problem: The desk for foreigners is closed. The hours and the service are very helpful.

PROBLEM: The "Service" is a curtain across the window and a big sign that says "NO ONE CAN SPEAK ENGLISH HERE. BRING AN INTERPRETER."

I realize that expecting people to speak English in a non-English country is a close minded and ridiculous thing - and the Japanese certainly do a fair sight better with English than I do with Japanese.

Still. Its the FOREIGNER SERVICE DESK.

PROBLEM: The hours for the desk are as follows:

8:30 am - 9 am
1:00 pm - 1:30 pm.


You could almost imagine that they don't want foreigners to get licenses. Imagine that!


We're still stuck here, but hopefully a good solution will emerge soon.

...


Unrelated note:

Problem: I have been putting off a post about a 24 hour party on the weekend before last.

Solution:
POST PREVIEW PICS!!!


Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting


You know, if I was ever going to have a story contest, I would want it to be how you managed to link these four pictures together given "BRENT" as a common denominator.



Notes:

MENSA - a society for really smart people, like Stephen Hawkwing and Asia Carerra.

Smokey - From "Smokey and the Bandit" - which involves a lot of car chases. Smokey was a cop. The role of "cop" in the world of "wild car chases" is an often overlooked dramatic role that allows a lot of introspection and tire spinning -t hings that don't often go together.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Too funny hon. So, did you get the couch in the end?