Wednesday, April 26, 2006

Let's Bicycling!

So, one thing I have to share with you is my favourite grammatical error. Apparently, in Japan, it is common practice to use the word "Let's" with whatever it is they happen to enjoy.

Unfortunately, the things they happen to enjoy generally are... well... things. and thus... nouns.

So... using "Let's" with a noun can be really fun. Think things like

"Let's Photography!"

Even more enjoyable is the use of "Let's" with a verb+ing. It's called a "gerund"... but I couldn't think of a way to make the definition funny. Just look it up on Google. Anyway.. the example is the best way to see it.

Let's Bicycling! or Let's Bowling!

My favourite, of course, has to be the use of "Let's" with a non word, or ... more specifically, with a word that is correct when put through spell check, but is CLEARLY the wrong word.

Here are my favourite examples.

For Sandwich Construction...
Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

And for advertising a portable computer...

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting


Anyway... that gets me to the real reason for this post: Let's Bicycling... or more specifically.... Let's Confusing and Let's Lost!

I managed to get out to my friend Geoff's apartment this weekend. It's about 20-25 min and two trains away. Being a good chap, some time ago he very nicely offered me an unused bike that had been laying around his apartment courtesy of the previous teacher. So, after leaving it languishing at his house for about three months, this weekend I picked it up and had quite the adventure trying to bring it back to my lovely home.

You see, if you didn't know this, Japanese streets lack anything that vaguely resembles logic or order. Taxi drivers get lost trying to get you home, so you can imagine how well this whole "navigation" thing goes for a clueless me in a strange neighbourhood moving at a brisk as-fast-as-I-can-fucking-pedal-my-fat-ass kilometres per hour. Basically, you get just as lost as as ever, but at three times the velocity.

So... anyway... I got very lost several times. I won't give you the gory details except for these.

1) It took me about two hours and change to get from his house to mine. When I declared how much working out it was for me, they told me that the ride should have taken no more than 45 min.

2) I went the wrong way on my way to work. This may sound stupid to you... until you try and figure out where the hell "north" is at a sixteen point intersection. It took me about 10 minutes of hard riding in the exact opposite direction before I realized my error.

3) the previous two incidents made me over cautious, and I decided that I was lost at a point that turned out to be about 350 metres from my home. Thus, I spent about 70 minutes biking in circles after 11 pm yesterday trying to find my home.

The frustration highlight of #3 above was when I stopped to ask a businessman for directions on the way home (yes, in japanese).. "I'm sorry....Excuse me, Where is Kuji Station on the Nambu Train Line??? / Gomenasai... Sumi Masen... Kuji Station no Nambu Sen wa Doko Des ka?" He looked at me for a few seconds, then turned away without a word and kept walking.

Let's Racism!

Boy oh boy... did I ever want to do two things realllly badly...

A) Yell some choice insults at him in Japanese.

B) Play the Race Card on my blog.


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